Toastie ‘97

1:00AM
This should suffice as a journal entry for today:
Dear Susan,
It’s probably stupid that I have to do this, but I really don’t want to take up your time by talking to you, when I know that you won’t know what to say to me, and then you’ll just feel bad. All week, […]

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8:10PM
I could have written last night, but then my hours of sleep risked being greatly diminished. In a way, it’s good that I didn’t write, because I’m tired of trying to explain my waffling back in forth as to whether I feel I can stay in this room or if I need to move […]

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4:30PM
Typing out a journal entry is not the most productive thing I could be doing right now, so I will try not to spend too much time doing so.
The ride down on Friday. We left at 12:30. I had to go a little out of the way to go to the airport […]

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9:35PM
I found a PC in the computer lab where Larry and I are in order for Larry to print out a football pool sheet. I’m sure I don’t have very much time to write anything, but I’ll try to type out whatever I can.
My roommates were such a pain in the ass on […]

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7:10PM
The one gleaming positive right now is that I’ll be out of here in about 17 hours.
Jackson and Daniel were still awake at 4AM. They were in bed, but still talking up a storm. I couldn’t take it any longer. I took my blanket and a pillow and went into the […]

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2:35PM
My current nightmare has less than 48 hours remaining in it. I’ll be off to Atlanta soon enough. I’ve got a lot to explain in here, and I’ll try to do that now. I just read over my entries of the past few days to figure out what I have to […]

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12:30AM
I’ve been going through withdrawal, from Susan, and from Trent 2, and it was going along pretty fragily, but successfully, I think. But then, just before, I peered my head into the Trent 2 commons room to ask someone a question, and I peered a few seconds too long. I saw Susan, and […]

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8:00PM
I’ve recounted the events of the last couple of days (well, particularly of last night) to a couple of people already, so I don’t feel like writing anything in here. All I will write is that I’m still in pieces, and I’m more sure than ever that my friendship with Susan has […]

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1:10PM
I woke up late once again today, and I suppose I needed to after remaining awake until almost 5:30 in the morning. I stayed doing basically very little. I watched my laundry. I listened to music. I pondered where Susan had been all night and wondered if she was alright. […]

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3:00PM
I didn’t wake up until 1:30 this afternoon. I think it would be wisest for me to remain in this room for the rest of today. To wander up to Trent 2 for even a minute would not be in my best interests. I’m at another “Susan should not talk to […]

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3:30AM
I’ve managed to destroy things with Susan and within myself yet again. Things actually turned out okay on Thursday. Things were fine today. And then I eavesdropped on a conversation and I put myself back into hell, finding new ways to torture myself.

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7:00PM
I’m in a state of limbo right now as far as my bungee cord of life is concerned. Despite having my five-class day and despite getting a 75 on last Friday’s French exam (one-eighth of my total grade), I was in a great mood coming back to Trent from my computer science lab, […]

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12:20PM
I’ve made a mess of another day. I woke up at 10:07, seven minutes after I should have been at work. I called Margie, and she seemed to think I was sick and told me everything was okay, and I could stay home and rest. Okay. Lost three hours of […]

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2:15AM
Too much shit going on, but I’ll write a very broad summary of today:
-Full load of classes from 8-2
-Not prepared for philosophy; survived class
-Did decent job doing radio news
-Worked 3-5
-Made appointment for tomorrow afternoon with CAPS
-In decent mood, but
-Screwed up with Susan because
-I finished a new sonnet (which I’ll include in here soon)
-Put the sonnet […]

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1:50PM

Susan Barnett
The Honor of Your Company
Is Requested for Dinner
The Evening of
Sunday, October 3, 1993
at 6:00PM
(so we can talk)
RSVP at 613-xxxx

I didn’t wake up until 12:00 to my dismay. (I hadn’t gone to bed until after 5. My roommate Jackson was reading my Susan letter series and suprisingly, he didn’t think I was completely […]

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